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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28272096">this is not the end</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arbonne/pseuds/amethyst-noir'>amethyst-noir (Arbonne)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Stephen Strange, Hurt Tony Stark, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Protective Stephen Strange, Protective Tony Stark, Secrets, True Love</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 21:40:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,916</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28272096</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arbonne/pseuds/amethyst-noir</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Fuck magic. Tony could and would out-stubborn it when the price was having Stephen in his life, his bed, and his heart.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tony Stark/Stephen Strange</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>150</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>this is not the end</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/w_space/gifts">w_space</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is a little gift for the wonderful, amazing, and awfully talented @wspaceblog. I kind of took almost all of your prompts/requests and mashed them together into one story and I hope you like my mixture. 😉 All my gratitude goes to @atypical-snowman who looked this over and pronounced it postable.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"This must have hurt. I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you after your accident."</p>
<p>Stephen shivered as Tony traced the deep scar above his heart with gentle fingers. In an attempt to escape the need to answer he closed his eyes and turned his head away but did nothing to interrupt the careful touch. It felt nice after all, even though it dragged up memories and feelings better long forgotten and threatened to destroy the pleasant haze of sleepy contentment that had taken hold of him in the aftermath of what undoubtedly had been the best sex of his life.</p>
<p>Tony, thankfully, seemed to recognize his silent denial as what it was. He put his whole hand over the spot, covering Stephen's heart as well with the gesture, and put some gentle pressure on it.</p>
<p>"Okay. I get it. No talking about the scary looking scar," he said softly, somehow managing to infuse the flippant words with a world of deeper meaning and understanding, tinged with sadness. Damn the man.</p>
<p>Stephen turned his head back and looked at Tony. "Ancient past," he clarified. "Not worth thinking about it."</p>
<p>Tony didn't seem convinced, not that Stephen could blame him. "Whatever. As long as I can touch?" he asked hopefully and Stephen had to smile at that.</p>
<p>"Touch me wherever you want," he allowed graciously and grinned when he got a delighted laugh at that. "My body is yours to play with as you please." <em>And not only my body</em>, he just about managed to keep in.</p>
<p>Tony almost <em>purred </em>at that and began to trace the outline of Stephen's nipple with the same gentle touch, eliciting another shiver with that caress. "Nice. Lovely. I mean I pretty much thought so after the last few hours anyway but it's nice to have actual confirmation." He leaned down for a kiss and Stephen let him have his way for a moment or two before he wrapped his legs around Tony's body and flipped him over and on his back in a surprise move.</p>
<p>"My turn to play now," he announced with a grin, curious how Tony was going to react to that announcement.</p>
<p>Tony immediately relaxed under him and grinned back. "Okay. Whatever you want," he echoed what Stephen had told him not too long ago. "I'm yours to play with."</p>
<p>Oh, <em>nice</em>.</p>
<p>A moment later he was on his back again after Tony had flipped their positions again.</p>
<p>"But I think for tonight you want me to be on top, right? I seem to recall you saying something like that not too long ago. But if you want to switch..." The offer was genuine, Stephen knew, and for a moment he toyed with the idea of accepting, but the thought of Tony above him, telling him what to do or just grabbing him and moving him into whatever position he desired was even nicer.</p>
<p>"Next time," he decided after a moment.</p>
<p>"Oh, lazy," Tony teased. "I can respect that."</p>
<p>Stephen rolled his eyes but refrained from retaliation. Lazy described it pretty well, actually, but he had no intention of confirming that out loud. His body seemed to do a pretty good job of doing it anyway.</p>
<p>"I just don't want to disturb the world-renowned playboy at what he does best," he teased back. "I still want to know if the title is genuine or just damn good PR and need more data for that."</p>
<p>"Oh, don't worry," Tony gave back with a laugh. "I can assure you that my reputation is well deserved. You'll find that I'm very skilled in a lot of things. Like taking my lovers apart and make them beg for more. I'm great at that."</p>
<p>That sounded perfect, actually, and exactly like the kind of thing Stephen loved most. Somehow it wasn't surprising that Tony had determined that without Stephen having to say anything.</p>
<p>"After that glowing self-recommendation I now fully expect to not be able to walk tomorrow." He made sure to make his voice as deep as possible and to put a slightly demanding tone into his teasing words. It was so much more fun this way.</p>
<p>Tony grinned at him once again. "Don't worry, baby, your wish is my command. This way I can keep you here with me tomorrow and that was the plan anyway." He leaned down to seal his promise with a kiss.</p>
<p>"Sounds good," Stephen confessed after it had ended. "And now come here and show me that you're not only words and promises."</p>
<p>As it turned out Tony was more than capable of holding his promises. Multiple times, blowing Stephen's mind along the way. Afterwards, he didn't say a word but he traced the scar once again before settling his hand on top of it to hide it from view.</p>
<p>Stephen had never felt as safe or cherished as in the moment he fell asleep in Tony's arms with a smile on his face.</p><hr/>
<p><em>I wish you would trust me</em>, Tony thought the next morning.</p>
<p>He couldn't speak the words out loud, too afraid of the reaction they might get. Instead, he tried to convey the meaning of them in the way he touched Stephen's beautiful but horribly marked up body. When he and Stephen had parted ways he'd been healthy and a rising star in the medical field, when they had found each other again years later Stephen had become a scarred, hurting, deeply traumatized mess, somehow still compatible with the damage Tony himself had sustained in the meantime.</p>
<p>While Tony's damage was public knowledge Stephen's was still a mystery. A car crash, no matter how serious, couldn't be the only source for the multitude of scars on the gorgeous body or the far-away, lost look in his eyes. Hell, Tony still didn't really know what Stephen was up to these days, apart from some consulting work for the hospital.</p>
<p><em>"It pays the bills,"</em> Stephen had said, clearly unwilling to discuss it further, and Tony, in a rare attack of tact, had left it at that, too afraid of scaring Stephen away again with too many questions.</p>
<p>Stephen interrupted his pointless musings with a "hmm, yes. Like this."</p>
<p>Stephen's smile was radiant and his eyes glazed over with pleasure as he looked up at Tony, who, in turn, traced Stephen's spine once again with his fingertips.</p>
<p>"Cat," Tony accused and Stephen responded by stretching like one and making a sound not unlike a purr, making Tony laugh out loud and his brain shut off for a moment. "I wish you'd tell me who hurt you this badly," he said quietly, tracing the thick band of scar tissue that looked like it had been caused by some sort of giant and freaky tentacle.</p>
<p>A quiet sigh was Stephen's only reaction for a minute. Tony continued his gentle caresses, watching as the tension left the slender body.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry," Stephen offered after a moment. "One day. But now I have to go."</p>
<p>"Don't," Tony said in return. <em>Don't make promises you can't keep.</em> He made sure to keep his touch light. "Any plans for Christmas yet?" he asked. "Because I've been thinking..."</p>
<p>About Killian, Slattery and giant plush bunnies actually but Stephen didn't need to know that. </p>
<p>"I probably won't be here." Stephen sounded sad but also pretty definitive about that and Tony tried to swallow down his disappointment, all of his vague plans going up in flames.</p>
<p>"It's okay."</p>
<p>Stephen turned around to really look at Tony. "No, it isn't." He shook his head. "I'm sorry. I truly am." He reached out with a trembling hand and carefully traced the edge of the arc reactor scar. "I wish I could tell you but..." he stopped, clearly frustrated with himself. "I'm afraid that…" Another pause and Stephen just looked at him with big, sad eyes.</p>
<p><em>What the fuck?</em> Tony didn't like the nervous edge in his unbelieving laugh but there was no way to keep it back. "Now you're scaring me, baby. Whatever it is: It's okay. Except if you have a wife and a child on the side, that would be kind of a deal breaker actually."</p>
<p><em>That</em> at least got him a small smile. "There's practically zero chance of that being even a possibility in the whole of the multiverse," Stephen muttered.</p>
<p>"Oh, the <em>multiverse</em>, " Tony teased back. "I didn't know you're active in that field as well. Care to share a few of your theories? Bruce and I have been talking about that one, actually, and I'm always open for new input."</p>
<p>Stephen looked up at that and there was something in his eyes that made Tony feel the tiniest bit of fear. Something scary and ancient and otherworldly that had no place anywhere near the man Tony shared his bed with. Something that reminded him of Loki; of foreign worlds seen and unimaginable horrors endured. His hand on Tony's chest, faintly trembling, suddenly felt like it weighted a ton and breathing became almost impossible.</p>
<p>Tony shivered. "Stephen," he began but was interrupted.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry, Tony," Stephen whispered, let his hand drop and stood up. "I have to go," he repeated." I'll call you if… <em>when</em> I'm back."</p>
<p>The words were like a bucket of ice-cold water. "Back? From where?" The 'if' was still lingering but Tony couldn't concentrate on that. "Stephen?"</p>
<p>Stephen was leaning down to press the gentlest of kisses against his lips. "I'm sorry," he repeated and were that actual <em>tears</em> shining in his eyes. "I really have to go now. We'll talk later. It'll be the crappiest Christmas present ever and you'll probably never want to see me again afterwards but you deserve the truth."</p>
<p>Tony hated that the only thing he could say was yet another whisper of Stephen's name but Stephen just shook his head, grabbed his clothes and had vanished out of the bedroom in less than a minute.</p>
<p>The quiet "I'm sorry, Tony" he muttered as he left the room seemed to hang in the air for an eternity after he'd left.</p><hr/>
<p>The amazing night before had been Stephen's last gift to him and the apology his goodbye, Tony realized much later. The moment he did was the exact moment what was left of his heart broke for good.</p><hr/>
<p>"It's okay. I know him, he's one of the good guys. I'll take care of it," Tony promised and shut down the com channel before the protesting noises of his teammates could filter through. He had other things to worry about now.</p>
<p>Magic. Fucking Magic.</p>
<p>Magic wasn't the only thing ruining his life lately but it had the biggest share of the market by far. Not only had it filled his head with visions that still gave him nightmares, had changed his brain on a molecular level - he had the brains cans to prove that - and destroyed his relationship with Pepper.</p>
<p>No, it had taken his once-upon-a-time multiple-nights-stand turned lover and hurt and changed him almost beyond recognition.</p>
<p>"Stephen," he whispered in terrified awe as all of the tiny puzzle pieces fell into place and the full picture stood out in all of its grandiose, nauseating glory. "Magic? Really? That's your secret secret?"</p>
<p>"Hey, Tony," Stephen whispered back, pressing a hand against his side where he'd been hurt while single-handedly taking out the monster that had almost defeated the might of the assembled Avengers with some very impressive looking <em>magic</em>. "Long time no see."</p>
<p>Shortly before Christmas two years ago, actually, but who was counting? Not Tony, who still had the gift he had intended to give to Stephen lying around somewhere that totally wasn't a shelf his walk-in closet.</p>
<p>"You're hurt," Tony blurted, shoving the memories of the past and Stephen's recent and terrifying display of raw power far away to deal with the emergency at hand. "Here, let me help." He swallowed down his fear and reached out, ready to catch and steady Stephen as the man stumbled into the offered embraced with a pained sigh. "Shh, I've got you."</p>
<p>Fucking magic, yes, but it was still <em>Stephen</em> who looked at him with a tear-streaked face and eyes wide in fear.</p>
<p>"I've missed you," Stephen confessed after tumbling into Tony's arms. "I'm sorry I went silent but there was this thing to do and then another and suddenly it was summer and it had been so long and you've been busy rebuilding the Avengers and then another thing happened and then I was in a coma for a couple of months and then… I always intended to come back."</p>
<p>"Shh," Tony repeated, recording but not processing the waterfall of words cascading over him. Later. Much later. He refused to dwell on 'I was in a coma'. "Later. Let's keep you from bleeding out first, okay?" He put his hand on top of Stephen's to put more pressure on the wound, getting a harshly indrawn breath and a pained groan in response. Fuck.</p>
<p>"I have tech to patch you up. Let me?" he begged, barely waiting for Stephen's nod of confirmation before he gently pushed his hand aside, ready to give his brand-new invention their first dose of action.</p>
<p>"Don't be scared, baby," he begged, the old pet name coming back naturally. "It'll hurt for a moment when the nanites enter your body but the first thing they'll do is to seal the damaged nerve endings." His poor Stephen had already to deal with so much pain from nerve damage, he hated to have to inflict even more.</p>
<p><strong><em>My</em></strong><em> Stephen.</em> He still saw Stephen as his, he realized while holding on to the trembling and quickly fading magic user that used to be his lover.</p>
<p>"Shh, it's okay. Relax. I've got you." He allowed himself the indulgence of pressing his face against Stephen's hair, breathing in the still familiar scent. "This is not the end for us," he promised. He didn't yet know how but somehow he would find a way to deal with this new revelation. He <em>had</em> to, because there was no way he was ready, or willing, or able, to let go of Stephen.</p>
<p>"Bring me home," Stephen begged, just before losing consciousness for good, leaving Tony with more questions than answer and the knowledge that he'd never stopped lov- caring for Stephen and that not even fucking freaky magic could accomplish that.</p>
<p>No. Fuck it. Loving was the right word. He'd never stop loving Stephen, no matter what.</p>
<p>"Whatever you want, sweetheart," he promised, kind of hating himself for giving in just like that.</p>
<p><em>It's Stephen</em>, he reminded himself. Really, what other choice did he have? He'd promised himself a long time ago that he'd give Stephen whatever he wanted, if only he would come back to Tony.</p>
<p>"Missed you," he whispered into Stephen's dark hair, more streaked with silver now.</p>
<p>
  <em>I always intended to come back.</em>
</p>
<p>Whatever had kept Stephen away from him it hadn't been by choice. The words lifted a weight from Tony's heart and soul and he carefully picked Stephen up to honor his promise.</p>
<p>After a trip to the medical wing of the Avengers Compound, of course. Tony was looking forward to the inevitable arguing about that, actually.</p>
<p>"Welcome back, you stupid asshole," he murmured and pressed a chaste kiss against Stephen's forehead. "Not letting you go ever again."</p>
<p>Fuck magic. Tony could and would out-stubborn it when the price was having Stephen in his life, his bed, and his heart.</p>
<p>*</p>
<p>
  <em>"Your friend is a wreck."</em>
</p>
<p>The rather brutal - but not unfriendly - assessment of the doctors haunted Tony even hours after they had been said.</p>
<p>"No," had been Stephen's first word when he'd woken up in the medical wing, looked around and realized where he was. "No way in hell and I've been to hell and back. I'm getting out of here."</p>
<p>The old arrogance and coldness was back but Tony could clearly see that it was only a very thin front to hide the hurt and fear.</p>
<p>Before anyone could say or do anything he'd grabbed the massive and kind of funny looking ring waiting next to him and conjured some freaky, sparkly circle, making everyone take a step or ten back in fear in respect.</p>
<p>"Stephen," Tony tried, nodding to the medical team to just run for their lives like they wanted to. Like <em>he</em> wanted to, really. "Please."</p>
<p>"I'm not doing this," Stephen gestured at their surroundings, "again."</p>
<p>"You're hurt."</p>
<p>"And your tech patched me up enough so I can go home." His demeanor softened a bit. "You can come with me," he offered and gestured towards the sparkly circle.</p>
<p>"Where to?" Tony asked instead of the instinctive 'no!' that wanted to be let out.</p>
<p>Stephen actually smiled at that. "Home," he said with so much warmth and longing in his voice that it suddenly became clear that this was the 'home' he'd meant when he begged Tony to take him there.</p>
<p>Not the penthouse apartment they had more or less shared once upon a time. The realization was a bitter one and Tony tried to swallow down the urge to cry. He'd lost. Lost against magic like so often before.</p>
<p>"Tony? Tony! Hey, what's the problem?"</p>
<p>The circle - portal - was still glowing but Stephen wasn't looking at it anymore. Instead he was in front of Tony, blocking his line of sight to the cursed thing and carefully and slowly put his trembling hands on both sides of Tony's face. The familiar and missed touch soothed Tony's rattled nerves a little bit and he closed his eyes with a faint sigh, treasuring the touch.</p>
<p>"Tony?"</p>
<p>How could Stephen's voice be so cold in one moment and so warm and full of emotion the next? How could he be ready to flee through a magic portal only to turn around and wrap his arms around Tony to hug the breath out of him a heartbeat later?</p>
<p>"Come with me," he begged. "I have so much to tell you but I don't want to do it here."</p>
<p>Tony, totally against his nature, just silently clung to Stephen, careful of not touching his left side where he'd been hurt and patched up, and let the tears fall.</p>
<p><em>Don't go</em>, he begged without speaking a single word. <em>Don't go where I can't follow.</em></p>
<p>"What's going on?"</p>
<p>He'd never told Stephen about Wanda, Tony realized in that very moment. He'd been so careful to keep that horrific part of his life apart from the good times with Stephen that he'd never even so much as uttered the words 'magic' and 'visions' in a non-ironic context near his lover.</p>
<p>"Magic," he finally managed to squeak out. "Freaks me out," he confessed. "It hurts," he added almost inaudible.</p>
<p>"Tony? What's going on, my love?"</p>
<p>
  <em>My love.</em>
</p>
<p>The words, so yearned for but never heard in Stephen's unique voice, were like a cold shower, bringing him back from the brink of a panic attack. He still didn't let go of Stephen but clung to him even more.</p>
<p>"Magic hurts," he repeated. "Gets into my brain and ruins everything."</p>
<p>Silence. Then, after long moments of nothing Stephen touched his temple if careful fingertips. Tony didn't flinch. Much.</p>
<p>"Who hurt you?" Stephen asked and while the words were as gentle as his touch there was an ice-cold fury beneath that Tony had never heard before in his voice.</p>
<p>He was too tired to keep up the charade of the last few years. "Wanda," he whispered. "Used magic to put some crap into my mind that never went away. Changed something in my brain chemistry. Can't get it out. Always there, showing me things I don't want to see. It hurts."</p>
<p>"Oh. So that's what made you change. I thought it was because of the Iron Man thing." Stephen held on to him even tighter. "I'm sorry I didn't notice or I would have helped."</p>
<p>Tony had to laugh hollowly at that. "There is no helping me. I've tried everything."</p>
<p>"I can." Stephen sounded so sure about that.</p>
<p>His fingers wandered down and gently encouraged Tony to raise his head from Stephen's shoulder. He followed the careful guidance, too afraid of hurting Stephen's fragile hand with his resistance.</p>
<p>There was once again that strange <em>something</em> in Stephen's eyes. Like he'd seen too much and knew too much. Fuck, he probably had.</p>
<p>"Do you trust me?"</p>
<p>He shouldn't. He really, really shouldn't. Not after everything Stephen had kept from him. Not after everything that had happened to him.</p>
<p>"Yes," he said after a moment or two, hating himself for the note of desperate hope in his voice, getting a brilliant smile in return.</p>
<p>"Do you trust me enough to brave that portal?" he asked, gesturing towards the sparkly circle. "Normally I would say we can go the scenic route but I can really do without cars and flying might not be the best thing in both of our conditions."</p>
<p>"You can fly?" Tony asked, fixating on that to find some sort of equilibrium.</p>
<p>Stephen laughed. "Kind of. With the help of a friend I stupidly left home today because it had something to do and I couldn't find it at short notice. You'll see. Later. First I want to see how deep the damage goes." He once again touched Tony's temple. "If you let me."</p>
<p>Tony swallowed and eyed the portal. "Very deep. Molecular level deep."</p>
<p>"Fuck," was Stephen's eloquent reply. "I still want to see for myself."</p>
<p>"Prayer circle and incense?" Tony guessed, desperately trying for some normalcy in that chaos of pain and magic that had erupted all around him.</p>
<p>"Step through the portal and see for yourself," Stephen invited him and after few more moments of beating his flight instinct into oblivion Tony took the offered hand.</p>
<p>In the end, it was unclear who was more clinging to the other for support as they passed the threshold and stepped into the incredible place known as the Sanctum Sanctorum a few chosen people.</p><hr/>
<p>The damage went even deeper than a molecular level, Stephen discovered a couple of hours later.</p>
<p>First, Tony, despite everything, had put his food down and refused to do anything before Stephen had rested. So they had ended up in Stephen's bedroom - the least magical room of the Sanctum since he wanted Tony as relaxed as possible - with Stephen stretched out on the bed, the Cloak as his blanket, and Tony next to him, just talking.</p>
<p>Stephen about how he found magic and how hard it had been to keep his vow of keeping it a secret from Tony after they'd rekindled their relationship and Tony about just often exactly magic had screwed him over.</p>
<p>The moment where both of them realized at the same time just how fucking blind and scared each of them had been of the other's reaction to their secret would have been funny if it wasn't so heartbreaking.</p>
<p>"You're taking this rather well considering what you just told me," Stephen said after Tony had finished, waving his hand to encompass pretty much everything around them. He shot a quick glance at the Cloak, silently begging it to stay put just a little bit longer. No need to freak out Tony anew when the man was just beginning to come down from his fight or flight state of mind.</p>
<p>Tony shrugged. "I don't have the energy anymore," he confessed. "Also, I trust you."</p>
<p>Stephen couldn't believe that. Not really. "Despite everything?" He once again waved his right hand around but this time Tony caught it in a gentle grip while he could feel the Cloak winding itself around his left wrist to keep it still. Damn them, teaming up without even knowing it to keep him from aggravating his already hurting wrists even more.</p>
<p>Another shrug but this time it was accompanied by a wistful smile. "I've always trusted you. Even back then when I knew you were keeping secrets." He put his free hand on Stephen's stomach, fingertips barely touching the area where he was still tender after being put back together by Tony's tech. "At least now I know where your scars come from. I was worried that you're caught up in something against your will."</p>
<p>"Caught up - yes; against my will - no," Stephen clarified. Tony gently squeezed his hand in silent support. "But I tend to get hurt rather often, yes," he confirmed. "Comes with the job," he added and Tony nodded in silent understanding.</p>
<p>"Yeah. Same here. I can't wait to see how you managed to mark yourself up since the last time I saw you and hear what happened," Tony said. A second later this brain caught up with his mouth and he flushed bright red. "Sorry, I didn't mean…"</p>
<p>Stephen laughed. "I'm not saying no that. Never." He'd never thought that he'd ever have the chance of Tony in his life and bed again but he wasn't complaining. "You probably won't like what you'll find", understatement of the century, "but I'm not unwilling." Strong words when the idea of undressing and letting Tony see the new damage was pretty much the last thing he wanted but he'd deal with that when - if - it actually happened. First he, <em>they</em>, had to deal with Tony's damage.</p>
<p>He carefully extracted his fingers out of Tony's loose hold and put his right hand on Tony's shirt, right above the deep scarring the arc reactor had left behind. He'd never had been with Tony while the thing had been keeping him alive - it had been put in after their casual affair, and while Tony had been with Pepper, and when they'd found each other again it had already been removed and replaced by internal implants.</p>
<p>"This is the third time we found each other again," he mused. "I think that the universe is trying to tell us something."</p>
<p>"That I'm a fucking idiot who let the love of his life go twice now?" Tony suggested, still bright red but also looking right at Stephen. "Warning: I'm not about to make the same mistake again."</p>
<p>Stephen wanted to smile at that but kept himself back. "I won't leave again," he promised. "But I have to confess that I'm surprised you're still here after everything I've told you."</p>
<p>In answer, Tony put careful pressure on his wound. The touch was so light that it allowed Stephen to relax just a bit more. He should feel vulnerable, lying here with Tony more or less looming over him, but he felt save like he hadn't in years, maybe even the last time he'd been with Tony.</p>
<p>"I need you," Tony said simply. "And I like to believe that you need me as well. There must be a reason our paths cross over and over again and I'm so tired of running and of being afraid."</p>
<p>"Let me see." Stephen made sure to make his words some weird mix between an order and a plea. "Please," he added much softer.</p>
<p>Tony looked down at his waist again. "Are you sure? We've got time. I've been doing this for years now. Or do you have other plans? Some weird tentacle monster to fight or something?" Years had passed but he managed to find and trace the scar where exactly that had happened even with three layers of clothing between his touch and Stephen's skin.</p>
<p>"Not today, no. I have a fight scheduled for next Wednesday but it's not a life or death situation. I can send someone else instead." He'd been careful to not tell Tony too much about Kamar-Taj but even without that it must have been obvious to Tony that he wasn't alone in his new profession.</p>
<p>Tony managed a weak grin at that. "Good to know. I'll keep my evening free to take care of you if you don't find a substitute in time." He grew somber again. "Time for chanting?"</p>
<p>Now it was Stephen's turn to laugh. "No. That's just show. We're beyond that. Here, help me up, please." He could have managed on his own but why should he?</p>
<p>Only that the Cloak pretended to misunderstand and swooped in behind his back to help him into an upright position before he'd even finished.</p>
<p>"Fuck. Not quite the way I wanted to… Tony, meet the Cloak of Levitation. Cloak? You know Tony. Play nice." He pretended to be busy finding a comfortable position while watching the unfolding drama.</p>
<p>To his credit Tony backed only away far enough until he was in danger of sliding off the bed before he caught himself. His innate curiosity came through and he was reaching out to touch two seconds later.</p>
<p>"What the hell," he whispered as the Cloak reached back and wound a corner around his wrist in greeting. "Cloak of Levitation," he repeated with only a hint of fear in his voice. He looked at Stephen. "Levitation. I presume this is the flying you talked about earlier?"</p>
<p>Stephen just nodded and gave a sheepish smile as the Cloak and Tony explored each other; two curious being trying to get to know each other. "I can't say it's harmless per se but it likes me a lot and would never hurt someone I care for," he offered in the spirit of total honesty.</p>
<p>Tony and the Cloak were still busy seizing each other up. It would have been funny if it wasn't so important to Stephen that his hopefully soon-to-be-again lover and his closest ally liked each other.</p>
<p>"I can respect that," Tony finally offered and the Cloak shook itself in silent confirmation before curling up over Stephen's legs and carefully supporting his middle. "Is it alive?"</p>
<p>"Not alive in the sense we would define but it's sentient." Stephen gently patted the Cloak. "And very, very ancient. I'm lucky it choose me or I would have died…" <em>even more often than I already did</em>, "… a long time ago," he finished. Honesty, yes, but not everything at once.</p>
<p>He made sure that the Cloak was wrapped securely around his middle to give him maximum support before he reached out with both hands. "Come here," he begged and made sure to pitch his voice to a low and soothing tone. Tony had always responded well to his voice and time hadn't changed that, he noticed to his great relief.</p>
<p>It took him a moment but then Tony shook himself and moved closer again. "How do you want me?"</p>
<p><em>Just like this. Trusting. Still <strong>Mine.</strong></em> Stephen smiled and spread his legs a little bit. "Come here."</p>
<p>Tony understood immediately and shook his head. "Stephen," he tried.</p>
<p>"Stop. You won't hurt me. Your new nanite-technology is a miracle in itself, your doctors gave me the green light," or something like that, it wasn't like he hadn't seen the horrified stares before they all had ran away after all, "and the Cloak will do the rest. Come here were you belong. Please, darling."</p>
<p>Another defiant look but in the end Tony caved surprisingly quickly. Either he was even more exhausted than he looked, starved for touch, or a combination of both.</p>
<p>"Have you been with anyone since…" <em>I left</em>, Stephen asked while they both shifted around until the found a comfortable position with Tony leaning against Stephen's chest.</p>
<p>Instead of the half-expected quip there was only a simple "no". Then, after a hesitant pause: "You?"</p>
<p>How to answer that? With a half-truth. "No." Not in this dimension or with another human at least, and Tony had always been the only one he'd allowed to be on top. "You've ruined me for anyone else." He'd never love anyone else like he loved Tony, he just knew that.</p>
<p>Tony leaned back so he could look Stephen in the eyes. "Good to know," he said and smiled.</p>
<p>Stephen smiled back. "Yeah. And now let me see what's going on in that beautiful mind of yours," he begged.</p>
<p>Tony shrugged. "Chaos and destruction. See for yourself."</p>
<p>Stephen hated the tone of resignation. Tony wasn't supposed to give up, not ever. "Relax and let me in," he murmured. He put his right arm around Tony's waist to keep him close and ground him, grabbed Tony's left hand with his own and allowed his magic to do its thing.</p>
<p>*</p>
<p>The damage went even deeper than to the molecular level. Good then, that Stephen was qualified not only as a neurosurgeon but also as a witch doctor, as Christine had called him affectionally not too long ago.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry," Stephen whispered into Tony's hair, not that Tony could hear him. Stephen had let him slip a light sleep after he'd finished rummaging around in his mind, trying to patch up at least the most gaping of the holes Wanda's assault had left behind.</p>
<p>Considering how severe the damage was and how long ago it had happened it was a wonder Tony was as sane as he was and his overprotectiveness and need to be prepared for anything so much easier to understand now.</p>
<p>"I can fix this," he promised. It would take time and patience, yes, but he could. There was no way he could let Tony continue to suffer like that.</p>
<p>"Gonna admit, it would be nice to be able to sleep through the night without having to exhaust myself first," Tony murmured drowsily. Stephen wasn't even surprised that he was awake again. "Feels better," he continued. "What did you do?"</p>
<p>"Took some mystical energy and redirected it to patch a few of the most obvious places where remnants of other timelines try to force their way into your mind."</p>
<p>A near-silent laugh. "Okay. Keep your secrets then, Gandalf."</p>
<p>"I'm not <em>that</em> grey yet!" Or that old.</p>
<p>"You're not going to be grey, judging by the silver and white that's already there." Tony patted his hand soothingly. "Sorry, baby, but you're going straight to white. Don't worry, you wear it well. Makes you look very distinguished."</p>
<p>Stephen grinned at the new yet still familiar back and forth. "I can do much more," he said. "Not only patchwork style but actual healing. It'll need time and commitment from both of us but I'm pretty sure that I can fix most, if not all, of the damage."</p>
<p>Silence. Then a quiet "still a doctor, I see, and arrogant as hell".</p>
<p>"Always," Stephen promised. "It's a package deal, actually."</p>
<p>"I'll take the whole thing then. The magical doctor with all his talents, the gorgeous body, and the voice to die for."</p>
<p>"There'll be lots of trauma free of charge," Stephen pointed out. One could say many things about him, most of them not very flattering, but never that he wasn't a realist.</p>
<p>"That's okay. What would a wreck like me want with Mr. Perfection? This way maybe we can help each other." Tony once again twisted around so that he could look at Stephen. "If you'd like."</p>
<p>If he'd <em>liked</em>? There was nothing he wanted more, actually. Instead of more useless words Stephen leaned in to shut Tony up with the first kiss of their new old relationship.</p>
<p>"Three times' the charm," Tony promised, moving around so that he could sit between Stephen's legs and hold his head still for better access. "Best early Christmas present ever. Not letting you go again, sweetheart," he added after a heartbeat.</p>
<p>Stephen shivered at the promise and smiled into the kiss. "Likewise. For both things," he whispered against Tony's lips, just to have the last word and surrendered himself into the kiss and the first, careful touches as Tony began to rediscover how he liked to be touched.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The alternative title for this was/is <i>Sunny Days Ahead</i> (taken from a gorgeous journaling card I have) and both of the titles are kind of a prophecy I truly hope will be fulfilled for all of us in 2021.</p>
<p>Thank you so much for reading! 🤍</p></blockquote></div></div>
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